Biography Codi
she doesn't talk a lot, but when she does its the word of Satan upon her lips.
a lot of people ask why I don't turn to my religion for help. and my answer is not that I don't believe, its that where was my religion when I really needed it? but still, I think it get talked down on. people bash and attack religion, why? is it because it shows how bias we can be? or maybe the fact that it shows all that's wrong with us. or, the fact that it shows people who dare I say are smarter than us. people who have more will than us. people who want to believe in something bigger than ourselves. that last reason, is the reason I don't believe in religion. what I believe is that those people, are smarter than me. they wish for more than what we have. "Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be filled". well, I don't. I'm a horrible person who does nice things. I am just a tool for people to use and dull down. people can be nasty but you have never heard my thoughts, what I really think. and if you did then I might finally turn to religion just to pray for you. because my mind can barely function with it. I'm a horrible person, who deserves the Justice that they speak of in religion. more than I already am. As of now I am bleeding out with my demons. we chant and cry for help while our blood drowns it out. I'm not smart enough for religion. I'm not smart enough to possibly comprehend that there is more than the noise of my own head. if in some way I am brought to the attention of a world class surgeon in the form of a specialist with a notepad, I will be sent back to my home. my home beyond the hill down in the valley past the gorge hidden in the bracken past the stepping stones at the turn off and deep in the river. there the eyes will have turned me away, ashamed of what I have done and who I have become. those glowing eyes that peer through the mist. they will have sent me off to follow the path my demons have lay out for me. but its ok. its ok because my demons walk it with me. bleeding the same blood every step of the way.
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