Okay, incorrect quotes are way easier when I know the characters better, but here's the ones I made so far! Enjoy!
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Morgan: Why would you do that?
Nico: Because I feel guilty.
Olympia: Guilt is a trick emotion. It’s put there by your parents to stop you from doing things that feel good.
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Nico: When life gives you lemonades, make lemons! Life will be all like "whaAttT?"
Mai: Life lessons that schools can't teach you.
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Akemi: You’re an idiot.
Griffin: That’s the charm.
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Erza: It's called cauliflower, not ghost broccoli.
Mai, eyes wide: I know what I saw.
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Olympia, singing to the tune of I Kissed a Girl: I killed a guy, and I liked it-
Ezra, whispering: Should we call the exorcist?
Haysiya, also singing: The taste of his cherry chapstick.
Akemi, appalled: Call the exorcist.
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Hasiya: Hold on, I can explain!
Akemi: Really? Can you now?
Haysiya: I can if you give me a minute to think of a convincing lie.
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Mai: You’re such a dumbass (affectionate).
Nico: Aww, you’re such a whore (complimentary).
Jäger: How are you talking like that in real life?
Mai: Witchcraft (derogatory).
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Hasiya: There are three chairs and five kids. What do you do?
Mai: Get two more chairs.
Olympia: Cut each chair in half to make six.
Jäger: Make them FIGHT for their seats!
Akemi: I would never be near children.
Morgan: Get rid of two kids.
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Morgan: Thanks for not telling Akemi what happened.
Ezra, dumbfounded: I wouldn’t even know where to begin trying to explain this.
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Nico: I’ve done a lot of dumb stuff.
Olympia: I witnessed the dumb stuff.
Jäger: I recorded the dumb stuff.
Mai: I joined you in the dumb stuff.
Akemi: I TRIED TO STOP YOU FROM DOING THE DUMB STUFF!
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Olympia, texting Hasiya: Roses are red, Tony Hawk is a skater…
Hasiya′s phone, auto-replying: I’m driving right now–I’ll get back to you later.
*Later*
Hasiya, texting back: Fuck you.
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Sorcerer: I give you a cursed amulet!
Nico: Cool! It’ll make me look cute, and the shadow that follows me will make me more active, I’ll get out more!