Isolabella: Dearly Beloved, we are here today to remember Umbria, taken from us in the prime of life; when they were crushed by a runaway semi, driven by the Incredible Hulk.
Umbria: Aww, you knew my favorite cause of death.
---
Umbria: Being gay is a constant battle between "I wish to sit on a window bench with my lover, our legs tangling as we listen to the birds" and "Hey, let's go throw rocks at fascists" and I think that's very sexy of us.
Isolabella: If the window's open and you time it right, you can do both.
---
Umbria: Talk dirty to me~
Isolabella: Inflation is a serious problem and lumber prices are at a high.
Umbria: Wha-
Isolabella: The economy is in shambles.
---
Umbria: Can I have 2 straws with that milkshake?
Isolabella: Aww-
Umbria: With 2 straws, I can drink it double as fast!
---
*At a speed dating event*
Isolabella: Oh wow, people are really shallow.
Umbria: Consider it a background check. For example: Do you have a death certificate?
Isolabella: *Checks their pulse* Sorry, not yet.
Umbria: Good, I'm not fucking a ghost again.
---
Umbria: The stars are so beautiful...
Isolabella: They're just giant balls of gas.
Umbria: You know what, if you're just going to ruin this, then-
Isolabella: And yet none of them are as huge as my love for you.
Umbria: Oh...
---
Isolabella walking into the kitchen and seeing all their limes peeled: Umbria, I love you but, what the h-e-double FUCK.
Umbria, sipping coffee happily: I love you too :)
---
Isolabella: Did it hurt when you fell-
Umbria: From heaven? Wow, I didn’t think you were such a flirt-
Isolabella: No, I meant when you fell down the stairs.
Umbria: ...
Isolabella: You just laid there for 15 minutes.
Fall Month: 2 
Day 
