Garvin grumbling and shaking his head; "The knife was the only thing I could afford, how much did Jayco cost compared to it? Where'd you even find a Jayco?"

Jayco would be snatching all three of them so they don't have to worry about someone intruding on them while they sleep

1. Six dogs

2. Jayco

3. Also Jayco

Also, Jayco may or may not kidnap his three "husbands" to travel with him

Brosc, waking up tied up in the back of a carriage: what the fuck happened?

Garvin: Jayco kidnapped us again

Brosc: awww that's kinda sweet but I swear I will kill that man <3

Is it bad that I want the top three matches done for all of my characters here? XD Like, we already have the ship for Garvin but I still wanna see the top three matches lmao

Garvin being aware of what's happened is hilarious and accurate

Jayco: I don't dab. I stab.

-

Brosc: I mean, sure, I have my bad days, but then I remember what a cute smile I have.

-

Garvin: What are you eating?

Suya: You wouldn't like it, it's really salty.

Garvin: I like you, don't I?

-

Jayco: Do you want to be the Sun in my life?

Brosc: Yes.

Jayco: Good, then stay 92,935,700 miles away from me :)

-

Garvin: What do you call a dictionary on drugs?

Jayco: If you say "addict-ionary" I swear I will cut you.

Garvin: I was actually going to say "high definition", but your answer's much better.

Jayco: …

-

Suya: If we were in prison you guys would be like my bitches.

-

Brosc: Met a dumbass today. Awful.

Jayco: You looked in a mirror?

Brosc: someday you will have to answer for your actions and god may not be so merciful.

-

Jayco: Any advice before Brosc and I fight?

Garvin: Don’t wet yourself in public.

Jayco: Not the kind of advice I was looking for!

-

Suya: To everyone who has treated me poorly; I am sexier than you.

-

Garvin: Ooh, somebody has a crush

Jayco: Pfft, I don’t have a crush on Suya I just think they’re cool, it’s not like I stay up at night thinking about them.

*Later that night*

Jayco, very much awake: Uh oh.

-

Jayco: My ultimate goal is to punch God in the eye, just to spite him one last time.

-

Suya: Is this your plan B?

Garvin: Technically, this is plan P.

Suya: Plan P? Is there a plan M?

Garvin: Yes, but I marry Jayco in plan M.

Jayco: I like plan M.

-

Suya: Look, I’m glad everyone’s on the same page.

Suya: But it’s the last page in a book titled “we’re all going to die”.

Garvin: That’s not even clever.

-

Brosc: So Garvin, how did your first time cooking dinner go?

Garvin: Pretty good if I do say so myself.

Brosc: Oo! Okay, what are we having?

Garvin: Alright, so for appetizers, we have a potato.

Brosc: A whole potato?

Garvin: Yes. And then for the main course, we have grilled cheese sandwiches!

Brosc: These just look like big slabs of black.

Garvin: Because that's what they are!

Garvin: And then for dessert, we have chocolate.

Brosc: These are just chocolate chips?

Garvin: They sure are!

Garvin: And then for drinks, we have toast!

Garvin: *lifts up a glass of blended toast* Bon appetite!

-

Brosc: Can we go out to get icecream?

Garvin: Did you ask Suya?

Brosc: They said no.

Garvin: Then why did you ask me?

Brosc: They're not the boss of you.

Garvin, internally: It's a trap, it's a trap, it's a trap.

-

Garvin: When will Ted himself...finally show up to the talk?

Jayco: The final boss.

Brosc: You guys know TEDtalks stands for technology, entertainment, and design talks, right?

Garvin: I will not let Ted hide behind these lies any longer!

-

Garvin: Alcohol is delicious! ...I mean, MAlicious. Sorry guys, I’m really drunk right now.

-

Brosc: We all have our demons.

Brosc, grabbing Jayco: This one’s mine.

-

Garvin: I like to play this game called nap roulette. I take a nap and don’t set an alarm. Will it be 20 min or 4 hours? Nobody knows. It’s risky and I like it.

-

Garvin: Life is like Suya. It's short.

-

Garvin: I’m here for the cult stuff.

Jayco: How did you find us?

Garvin: I saw your ad on craigslist.

-

Jayco to Suya: First rule of battle, little one... don’t ever let them know where you are.

Garvin, shooting out of frame: WHOO-HOO! I’M RIGHT HERE! I’M RIGHT HERE! YOU WANT SOME O’ ME?! YEAH YOU DO! COME ON! COME ON! AAAAAH! Whoo-hoo!

Jayco: 'Course, there’re other schools of thought.

-

Jayco: I think this might be a bad idea...

Garvin: Don't start thinking on me now!

-

Jayco: Sometimes I drink milk straight from the container.

Garvin: The cow??

Jayco: What?

Brosc: Garvin, W H Y?

-

Garvin: I’m totally useless.

Suya: You’re not totally useless.

Suya: You can be used as a bad example.

-

Suya: I'm allergic to death.

-

Jayco: All in all, a 100% successful trip.

Suya: But we lost Brosc.

Jayco: All in all, a 100% successful trip!

-

Jayco: You’d be stupid to lay a hand on me.

Garvin: Oh, you’d be surprised how much stupid shit I do.

-

Jayco, at the slightest provocation: I came into this earth screaming and covered in someone else's blood and I'm not afraid to leave the same way.

-

Garvin: Underestimate me. That'll be fun.

-

Garvin: They say that the most valuable things cost nothing.

Suya: They also say that being cheap is an annoying trait, so don’t overuse that excuse.

-

Brosc: I'm hot, I’m tall, I'm gay, and I'm on my theatre kid arc.

-

Brosc: All snacks are gone.

Suya: I AM LITERALLY RIGHT HERE?!

-

Brosc: Ducks are better than rabbits.

Jayco: What? Rabbits are adorable. Have you ever been in a fight with a duck? Ducks are jerks.

Garvin: Duck is delicious! Rabbit is all gamey.

Jayco: We’re not talking about flavour, Garvin!

Garvin: Flavour counts!

Jayco: Who carries around a duck’s foot for good luck? Anyone?

Suya: You wrap yourself in a comforter stuffed with rabbit hair. I’ll wrap myself in a comforter stuffed with duck feathers! Who’s cozier?

Jayco: Okay, but-

Suya: NO, NO, NO, NO. WHO’S COZIER?

Garvin: Then why don’t we take a rabbit, a duck, stick ‘em in a cardboard box and let them fight it out!

Jayco: BECAUSE IT’S ILLEGAL, GARVIN!

Garvin: ONLY IF WE BET ON IT, JAYCO!

Brosc: I- Jesus-

-

Brosc: I just want someone to take me out.

Suya: On a date?

Jayco: With a sniper gun?

Garvin: Both if you're not a coward.

OML. Why is Suya such a sassy shit in all your rolls. They legit would all work for him 😭✋🏼✨

Jayco has the violent ones and I approve

The Four Suburban Husbands

It's an unspoken rule that if one exists the other three exists

Their relationship is canon now and I'll fight anyone that disagrees with it