Hmmm, yes, I can see this

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Don't worry about it! :)

Things are meh, better than last week, still not great, sooooo

How are you?

Also, mind if I rant to you guys about something stupid real quick, it's not bad, promise XD

Don't worry about it!

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And no, no one hurt me :)

So, things have been pretty sucky lately, but I'm actually going to move away from the mental health shit for a little bit (kind of) to talk about this. First things first, I identify as an Asexual Panromantic female (I'm also ambiamorous), and I've never been in a relationship before, never really been interested... Well, there are these two people who I've known for about a year now, and they've both helped me a lot with mental health and stuff without even knowing it, especially recently. One is Bisexual and the other is unsure of their specific sexuality, but they've stated they don't care about gender. To put some personality into perspective, I'm going to compare to our characters, so, the bisexual is somehow a chaotic mix between Cal and TJ, very chaotic and loud, but very kind, the other is a mix between Nabih and Leroy, quiet, very, very smart, and kind but a little protective. I'm most close to the personality of Axel with a hint of Ethan. So there's that-

Well, I may or may not be kinda crushing on them both. Which is a bit of a problem. I already know for a fact that Cal-TJ has a crush on someone else, and Nabih-Leroy is very close to someone, and though they haven't said anything, I wouldn't be surprised if they were dating and just didn't feel comfortable telling us. I also don't know that either of them are interested in a poly relationship. Don't get me wrong, I won't be super upset if they aren't, and I'm very happy to just stay friends with them, I just get a little nervous while they're around and I don't really know what to do. We're all going out to get lunch and coffee today (as long as the weather isn't an ice storm-), and I'm very excited but also nervous. Send help. :')

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There we go, that's my rant for today. Very fun XD

That's not great... Uhhh... Do they know your poly first and foremost? You should probably just take some baby steps to see if they might like anyone first too. How'd the meet up go??

No, they don't, but they know I'm ace and pan. I mean, I'm pretty sure it's not gonna work out because one of them for sure likes someone else and I've got no idea about the other. The meet-up went great though, it was a lot of fun!

Okay well, I would definitely work on saying that to them. And hey, just ask your Cal/TJ friend if they are into said person you think they are into. If Cal/TJ friend is into the person but they are not open to poly relationships, that's fine! Sadly you have to respect that. If they into the person but are also open to poly, there are different types of polyamorous relationships.

Yeah, they told me they were into them, it's fine, I'm honestly okay with staying friends with them, I'd very much prefer that to starting drama and loosing people I care about and stuff. I'm a little sad, but I'll be fine, I've been through worst shit with loosing people in the past, so this is honestly the least that could happen, I'm happy I have good friends still :)